"Hi Neighbors," Scenes C, D, and E

This time the handwritten list of characters is "Laverne, Shirly, Mrs. Havenwurst, Lenny, and Squiggy."  Yeah, they're getting closer.

We begin in the girls' apartment, "day," although Scene B was set at night:

AFTER A MOMENT, LAVERNE AND SHIRLEY ENTER, CLOSE THE DOOR AND START TO HANG UP THEIR COATS.

LAVERNE

So I took it back and said it was too big.  He says, "Why don't I buy you dinner and help you fill it out?"

SHIRLEY

That's gotta be the oldest line in the book.

LAVERNE

Yeah.  I'm meeting him tomorrow.

Onscreen, the girls are already home and Laverne talks about getting the Fudgicle stain out of her smock.  Shirley says they should avoid the boys at lunchtime.

Mrs. Havenwurst tells Shirley to pay the rent "on the fifteenth like everybody else."  And she apologizes for bothering them "this late," so I'm completely confused about the timeline here.  Since this Shirley knows (unlike the filmed version) who wants her to vouch for them, she says, "Oh.  Well... uh...."

After Lenny says they told Mrs. H "the part about you being our oldest friend in the world," Squiggy was supposed to add, "And the part about how if we can't rent this place, we'll have to spend the night in my stepfather's station wagon."

They omitted Shirley saying, "They're... definitely... outgoing," and Mrs. H replying, "Well, nobody likes a 'Johnny-sit-by-the-fire.' "

Despite the title, Lenny was supposed to tell Laverne, " 'Bye, neighbor," because he, Squiggy, and Mrs. H were exiting.  And Shirley originally said, "Wait a minute, Laverne, don't jump to any conclusions.  I know what you're thinking.  You're thinking that if I had minded my own business in the first place, they wouldn't be moving into our building.  And you're perfectly right.  But let me ask you one thing, Laverne.  (SUDDENLY VERY SOFT) Are you going to hurt me?"  Onscreen, Shirley says it's a comical story and escapes to the bathroom.

Scene D is set in Lenny and Squiggy's new apartment, "later that night."  They left out Laverne telling Shirley, "We're gonna be late for the movies," as well as her saying, "Four hours ago you were apologizing for getting them into this building.  Why are you doing this?"  Then the part about Squiggy's stepfather dropping his stuff off came next, with the hot water bottle stuff later.  They added Shirley asking if Laverne is still mad at her.

Laverne noticing the bunk beds was added.  Her saying that it's Saturday night was also an addition by filming.  On the other hand, they left out Shirley promising, "From now on we'll stay out of their personal lives."

The teddy bear was not in the script, but the "stuffed iguana" was.  Onscreen, Laverne guesses it's a skinny pig, but here's how the scene ends in the script:

THE GIRLS START OUT.

SHIRLEY

Who do you think it belongs to, Lenny or Squiggy?

LAVERNE

I don't know.  It looks more like Squiggy.

THEY EXIT.

Scene E takes us back to the girls' apartment, "three o'clock following morning."  Laverne saying that Squiggy is a nightmare was added.  Otherwise, the scene is very alike in the two versions, and it closes out Act One.

Thoughts:

• I have never before heard the oldest line in the book.  Or "Johnny-sit-by-the-fire."
• What exactly did Laverne buy and try to return?
• Why would Squiggy's stepfather let them sleep in his station wagon?  Or are they planning to break into the car?
• Laverne being annoyed with Shirley meddling is definitely a bigger thing in the script.
• I like the idea of Laverne thinking the iguana looks more like Squiggy.  It's clear in both versions that she likes Lenny more than she likes Squiggy.