"Please Don't Feed the Buzzards," Scene K

It is now "one hour later":

FRANK, CARMINE AND THE BOYS ARE PRETTY WELL DRUNK, AND SING "WE AIN'T GOT A BARREL OF MONKEYS..."

FRANK/CARMINE/LENNY/SQUIGGY

(SINGING) "WE AIN'T GOT A BARREL OF MONKEYS, MAYBE WE'RE RAGGED AND MONKEYS..."

Sadly, this was omitted, and when the scene opens, the four men are drunk, but lying on the ground in a pile, not singing.  Squiggy's line about loving "Jay" actually ran, "Frank.  May I call you Frank... I love you.  (TO CARMINE) I love you...  and (TO LENNY) I love you..."  The "son I never wanted" exchange was indeed in the script.  But instead of Carmine's joke about his father and the two chairs, which makes Squiggy think Mr. Ragusa was a lovely man, there was instead this:

CARMINE

I remember when I was with my father.  He used to always smell like olives.

LENNY

Green or black?

CARMINE

He ate both kinds.  He smelled both ways.

And instead of Squiggy telling Lenny that if the "Grim Reefer" claims him, he'll leave Lenny his picture of Raymond Burr, which Lenny promises to leave back to him, it instead ran this way:

SQUIGGY

I may be rushing things, but, Len, you old sawbuck you, you've been just like a friend to me.  I'm gonna leave you my collection of old socks and all my used handkerchiefs.

LENNY

Thanks, Squig.  The socks never fit, but the handkerchiefs always seemed to be just the right size.

CARMINE

That's beautiful.

LENNY

Carmine, you can have my autograph photo of Mothra, and all of Squiggy's old socks.

Frank's wish that they'd all been this close when they were alive, and Carmine's cry of "Yeah, one for all and all for one" were kept.  But in the filmed version, the boys are rescued because they're at a nuclear testing site, while here are the last couple pages of the script:

CARMINE HUGS SQUIGGY.  LENNY HUGS CARMINE.  THEY ALL WALLA "I LOVE YOU'S."  WE HEAR THE SOUND OF A HELICOPTER APPROACHING.

CARMINE

Listen.  What that [sic]?

FRANK

(LOOKING UP) There!  It's a helicopter.

LENNY

(PUSHING CARMINE ASIDE) I'm saved!

CARMINE

Hey, what happened to all for one?

LENNY

I'm one, you're two.  They can be three and four.

SQUIGGY MAKES A MOVE TOWARDS THE HELICOPTER, BUT FRANK THROWS HIM ASIDE.

FRANK

No one's getting saved before me.

SQUIGGY

I thought I was like a son.

FRANK

Fine.  Women and children last.

THE SOUND OF THE HELICOPTER MOVES AWAY.

FRANK (CON'TD)

They can't see us.  (TAKES BOTTLE)  I'll signal to them with this...

FRANK TAKES THE EMPTY BOTTLE AND TRIES TO BLOW OVER THE OPENING.  HE MAKES LITTLE IF ANY SOUND.

SQUIGGY

Gimme that.  I'll show you how to play it.

SQUIGGY SNATCHES THE BOTTLE AND FLINGS IT UPWARD AT THE HELICOPTER.

LENNY

Wait.  They see it.  They're landing, Squig.  And they're throwing something back at you.

THE BOTTLE COMES DOWN AND SMASHES TO PIECES ON A ROCK.

SQUIGGY

Quick, Len.  We'll glue the glass together and fill it with old coffee.  Then we'll put the cork back in and sell it.

LENNY

We'll be rich again.  How many bottles can there be of Napoleon Coffee?

THE BOYS GET DOWN DRUNKENLY AND BEGIN TO GATHER PIECES OF BROKEN GLASS.

Squiggy really is more of a jerk in the rough draft than the filmed episode.  But I would say that this scene is a bit funnier in this version.  Also, I appreciate that, unlike some Season Eight writers, Goldberg and Alu seem to understand these characters and know that Lenny likes not only Bosco but Mothra.  I think it's interesting that Frank bonds best with Squiggy when they're drunk, like in the script for "Debutante Ball," where Frank has Squiggy call him Pop, and then Frank says, "I love it.  I always did want a son," to which Squiggy would reply, "I always did want a father."

And speaking of fathers and sons, is Carmine's father dead?