"Window on Main Street" script, Scenes A and B

STOCK:  EXTERIOR BARDWELL'S

CUT TO:

STOCK: INTERIOR DEPARTMENT STORE - PEOPLE SHOPPING WITH DEPARTMENT STORE BELL (THE PAGING SYSTEM FOR KEY EMPLOYEES) IN BACKGROUND.

CUT TO:

INT. STORE WINDOW - DAY

THE SET LOOKS LIKE A TINY STUDIO APARTMENT DONE IN A 60'S VERSION OF ULTRA-MODERN.  THERE IS A KITCHEN AREA, INCLUDING A MICROWAVE OVEN AND A FOOD SERVING DOOR WITH A PANEL OF PUSHBUTTONS.  A CABINET BIG ENOUGH TO CRAWL INTO IS UNDER THE MICROWAVE.  A PILL DISPENSING TUBE IS IN ANOTHER CABINET.  THERE IS A COUCH BY ONE WALL.  A MIRROR IS LOCATED IN A "VANITY" AREA.  THERE IS A SMALL TABLE AND CHAIRS AND A ROUND MILK GLASS GLOBE THAT SERVES AS A LAMP.  A LARGE SIGN READS "HOME OF THE FUTURE, BY FUTURECRAFT."

We do get an exterior of the store, but then it cuts right to the window set.  There are some extra touches, like the framed artwork on the walls.  I'll note that, as in the aired episode, there's a quick explanation of Shirley's changed marital status, but of course script-writing would've overlapped, especially at that fraught time.

After Mr. Hildebrand is glad he didn't send a wedding gift, Laverne was supposed to say, "She could use a wok."

Mike is described simply as "a man."  We lost the stage direction "Laverne and Friend [meaning Mike] Samba," which would've been interesting with the window in the way.

But overall, the first scene was mostly faithfully adapted for screen.  Then we go to the girls' "bedroom - later that night":

SHIRLEY IS SITTING ON THE BED WRITING A LETTER TO WALTER.  SEVERAL UNMAILED LETTERS ARE ON THE BED.  A TRAY OF FOOD IS NEXT TO THE LETTERS.  LAVERNE ENTERS FROM THE BATHROOM WEARING A ROBE AND TOWEL AROUND HER HEAD.  SHE'S RUBBING HER BACKSIDE AND CARRYING A DAISY DECAL.

LAVERNE

Shirl, if you insist on putting decals in the bathtub, remember, it's sticky side down.

SHIRLEY

Walter'll get a chuckle outta this.  (STARTS WRITING)  Laverne got a decal stuck ... on her hiney.

LAVERNE

You're writing him again?  You just wrote him a letter fifteen minutes ago...

SHIRLEY

Well, alot [sic] has happened since then.  Walter's interested in every little bit of news.

LAVERNE

(LOOKING AT WATCH) Then in your next letter, tell him I decided not to live in that window with you.

SHIRLEY

Laverne, Laverne.

That was all dropped, and Laverne is in a sleepshirt, with dry hair.  Shirley does seem to have at least one letter in bed with her though.  They skipped this after Shirley says that Laverne was understandably irritable after Vinne [sic] Augetelli locked her upside-down in his locker:

SHIRLEY

...I've always wondered why you would let him do that.

LAVERNE

Why?  Because he said I could hide in his locker while the wrestling team took their showers and the holes were on the bottom.

SHIRLEY

You watched the wrestling team?

LAVERNE

I couldn't even see anything above the knee.

SHIRLEY

Even for you, Laverne, I am appalled.

In the script, Laverne says, "Oh great.  Rhonda's here.  We get to hear about the midnight ride of Paul Revere," which onscreen became her wishing Rhonda would say, "Ho ho" instead of "Hi ho" and bring them presents.  Rhonda's Cher costume is described as "a tight black dress, long black wig, spike heels and black bolla."

After Shirley told Rhonda about Laverne's claustrophobia, Laverne complained, "Thanks a lot.  You don't have to tell everyone."  Also, after Rhonda said she once had a problem in her mind, she added, "But it's all gone now," which made Laverne comment, "Don't worry - It couldn't have gone too far."

The last part of the scene, after Laverne says she'll try the hypnotist, was left out:

RHONDA

(STARTS TO EXIT)  Wonderful.  I'll call my hypnotist for you as soon as I get back from my voice lesson.  I have to learn to sing off key.  (SINGING OFF KEY -- "I got you Babe.")

RHONDA EXITS.

LAVERNE

Why don't you write to Walter about Rhonda?

SHIRLEY

He's a man alone in a trench - Why stir him up?

LAVERNE TURNS THE LIGHTS OFF AND GETS INTO BED.

Thoughts:

• We do actually see Shirley onscreen holding a daisy decal at one point, but for whatever reason, they didn't bother with the thing of Laverne getting decals stuck to her hiney.
• It's not much, but we get some stuff about Walter here, or at least what Shirley tells us about Walter.
• He'll get a chuckle out of the decal mishap.
• He's interested in every little bit of news.
• Walter is alone in a trench, which seems odd for a medic, but maybe they hadn't decided on that specifically yet.
• Shirley doesn't want to "stir him up" by telling him about Rhonda.
• Why would Laverne wear a watch in the tub?
• Hello there, Horny!Laverne.  Shirley is appalled by the voyeurism.
• It's interesting that they toned down the insults of Rhonda.