"Teenage Lust" script, Scene B

It is now night in the [girls'] apartment bedroom.  Laverne strumming her guitar was added.  Shirley was supposed to enter carrying a mixing bowl.  Here's what got left out after Laverne tells Mike that Shirley is still in the bathtub.

SHIRLEY

That little tyke is persistent.  I'll give him that.

LAVERNE

Shirl, you ought to talk to him.  I've told him you were in the bathtub four times.  He's gonna think you're a clam.

SHIRLEY SITS DOWN AND HANDS THE BOWL TO LAVERNE.

LAVERNE

(MAKES A FACE) Euchh.  What's this?

SHIRLEY

It's a new skin cream formula.  I read about it in the Farmer's Almanac.  They say it does wonders for crows feet.

LAVERNE

No respectful crow would put his feet in this.  Trying to look younger for Mike, huh?

SHIRLEY

No, I'm not going to see him again so put Mike out of your mind.

LAVERNE

Go out with him, you said he was a young Warren Beatty.  Besides, if you don't have a good time he'll probably have to go home early.

SHIRLEY

I can't waste time dating some kid.  I need to settle down.  I need someone who can treat me like a woman.

LAVERNE

What's he gonna treat you like?  An end table?

WE HEAR THE PHONE RING.

SHIRLEY

Tell him I drowned.

LAVERNE

Shirl, what's the big deal?  It's just a date.  He doesn't want to marry you.

SHIRLEY

He's a kid.  Your father's got ketchup older than him.

LAVERNE

He's a strange man.

LAVERNE ANSWERS PHONE.

LAVERNE (CONT'D)

She says she's still in the tub.

SHIRLEY [sic] HANGS UP.

The next three pages made it in with some minor rephrasing, but we lost Laverne's closing line, after hearing the nickname of Mike's friend, "the Stallion": "Let me try some of this stuff [presumably the skin cream].  Ride 'em cowboy."

There is a slightly kinky Western theme going on with some of this script's omissions, as with the rope in Scene A.  As for the rest of this scene, I wish more had been kept.  It's interesting to get the girls' different takes on dating younger men, and Laverne in particular has some funny lines.  Note that at the time this episode was set, Warren Beatty was 29 (a year older than Shirley is supposed to be ) and had not yet become a superstar with Bonnie and Clyde.